This week is so much better than the last couple of weeks. Something was really wrong then but things seem resolved now for the better. I am getting used to this year in uni and there is no way I am quitting...not by a long shot!
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going, it's called taking the bull by the horns. So, second year....here I come!
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Make a promise only if you can keep it, otherwise, shut up!
Something else, whenever I promise to do something for someone, I make sure I do it even if it is late. And if I cannot, I don't and explain why.
Recently, someone promised to do something for me. I told this person my position on the matter and the response was rather promising. I figured that instead of going round in circles, I should just call a spade a spade, which I did. The consequences, were shocking. First, no response for what seemed like eternity. Secondly, a half-hearted response came which was not what I had expected bearing in mind that the opposite was promised. I was at a loss of words and felt like I was being a burden. Thirdly, I decided to opt out and leave things as they were pre-promise.
Fact - someone raised my hopes and dashed them soon after.
Fact - I wonder if I will ever ask for a favour again.
Fact - One knock down should not be the determining factor for every such opportunity in the future.
Fact - I probably will put on a brave shield and ask for help but this time with the remote expectation that help may not arrive so that I am not so disappointed when this eventually does happen.
Fact - I am an optimist, not a pessimist so surely there must be a reason why things are as they are (that is what I would like to believe).
Fact - I am down but not out!
Recently, someone promised to do something for me. I told this person my position on the matter and the response was rather promising. I figured that instead of going round in circles, I should just call a spade a spade, which I did. The consequences, were shocking. First, no response for what seemed like eternity. Secondly, a half-hearted response came which was not what I had expected bearing in mind that the opposite was promised. I was at a loss of words and felt like I was being a burden. Thirdly, I decided to opt out and leave things as they were pre-promise.
Fact - someone raised my hopes and dashed them soon after.
Fact - I wonder if I will ever ask for a favour again.
Fact - One knock down should not be the determining factor for every such opportunity in the future.
Fact - I probably will put on a brave shield and ask for help but this time with the remote expectation that help may not arrive so that I am not so disappointed when this eventually does happen.
Fact - I am an optimist, not a pessimist so surely there must be a reason why things are as they are (that is what I would like to believe).
Fact - I am down but not out!
2nd year
This year started and I feel like dropping out. It is full of so many things going on sometimes I wonder which way to go. As if all the pressure is not enough, I have been allocated a placement to an area that I cannot find on the map!
Everything seems to be getting worse by the day and even if I try to cheer myself up, looks like something negative is waiting round the corner to kill my lifted spirit. It's like having an invisible battle only you cannot see the opponent. I know people go through a rough patch sometimes in thier life but this one seems to be endless. It's making me lose my sparkle and my motivation is at an all-time low.
Seeking assistance is like throwing blows in the air because everyone seems to have or suddenly create a reason why they cannot assist. I am lost for options and my words seem to crumble to pieces. I think my mood has changed a lot and I feel that I have hit rock bottom real hard. My bum hurts from that huge fall I recently had and my head is constantly throbbing from what, I don't know.
At the moment, everything seems a blur. It's like trying to find your way on a path laced with cobwebs from top to bottom, looking like cotton wool streaks longer than I can imagine. The atmosphere is eerie with a ghost-like silence and the cold and clammy weather is not helping. It feels like I am playing a part for which I have been made up, almost like scenes from a zombie movie!
It doesn't feel like me at all. I want out of this misery, I am tired of being tired. At the moment a lot of things are irritating me. A critical analysis shows me that my coping strategies are getting rusty so I need to polish my act. But how? Someone help me!
Everything seems to be getting worse by the day and even if I try to cheer myself up, looks like something negative is waiting round the corner to kill my lifted spirit. It's like having an invisible battle only you cannot see the opponent. I know people go through a rough patch sometimes in thier life but this one seems to be endless. It's making me lose my sparkle and my motivation is at an all-time low.
Seeking assistance is like throwing blows in the air because everyone seems to have or suddenly create a reason why they cannot assist. I am lost for options and my words seem to crumble to pieces. I think my mood has changed a lot and I feel that I have hit rock bottom real hard. My bum hurts from that huge fall I recently had and my head is constantly throbbing from what, I don't know.
At the moment, everything seems a blur. It's like trying to find your way on a path laced with cobwebs from top to bottom, looking like cotton wool streaks longer than I can imagine. The atmosphere is eerie with a ghost-like silence and the cold and clammy weather is not helping. It feels like I am playing a part for which I have been made up, almost like scenes from a zombie movie!
It doesn't feel like me at all. I want out of this misery, I am tired of being tired. At the moment a lot of things are irritating me. A critical analysis shows me that my coping strategies are getting rusty so I need to polish my act. But how? Someone help me!
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